For Veteran's Day...

In honor of my late hubby, my current hubby, my daughter, and most especially, my late father, I wanted to post this poem written by my father a couple of years ago. My daddy served in the Second Armored Division of the U.S. Army under General George S. Patton as a radio operator during WWII, earning a Bronze Star for his excellent achievements overseas.

Enjoy, and Happy Veteran's Day to ALL our Vets and enlisted personnel overseas!

The Ballad of General George
(c) 2006 by Birl R. Brown, Sr.

(Author's Note: For the purpose of discipline, those under Patton's command were required to wear a necktie, while those of other military units and the National Guard were not. Shelter halves were 1/2 of a regulation pup-tent; two were buttoned together to erect.)

T'was in the southern parishes in Louisiana's heat
That General Georgie Patton's boys learned about 'compete'.
Chiggers, ticks, and okra fields, and skeeters big as tanks,
And a plentitude of gnats abound to aggravate the ranks,
For Louisiana's hot as hell, and only God knows why,
But I am one of Patton's boys, and I must wear my tie!

Generals George and Ed Rommel were classmates years ago
For both attended V.M.I. to warfare better know
But time had sharpened up the sword that cut the cord between,
It's like a guess in Russian chess, before a move's foreseen,
Louisiana's hot as hell, which none at all deny,
But I'm a Georgie Patton boy and I have to wear my tie!

Always, the tie must tuck between two buttons of the shirt,
The third and second only please, or suffer Georgie's hurt.
The tanks develop clouds of dust and respirators clog.
The heavy tanks can lose a track, or stick in oily bog,
Where Louisiana's hot as hell and I'm about to fry,
But I am still a Patton boy and I always wear my tie!

There was a time the General went to check the river's brink
Where a million hungry skeeters live, but he was there to think
And plan just how the units, in a crossing there, could fight.
So concentrated was his thought, he never felt a bite,
And I was wrapped in shelter halves, and just about to cry,
But yet, since I'm a Patton boy, I still had on my tie.

On a night run into Texas we were weary through and through,
The General reached into his Brief and a little flask withdrew.
He offered it to his Driver, who didn't drink, alas! It passed
Around from each to each: He took his swallow last.
I'll remember that 'Old Taylor', when I lay me down to die,
Just close the little coffin, please, but don't forget the tie!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
...We didn't.

Day 490...

Lots to catch up on today! I've gotten slack again...

OK, first off, I had such a great time last weekend! Ian, Krystal and I took the baby out to Stone Mtn. for the annual Highland Games, and we had a blast! Tracy came over from AL, along with Tess and Steph, from my Outlander Gathering group, and we were met out there by Micki, Julia, her friend Heidi, and Michelle. Other than the ones in our group who had not planned to attend, the glaring exception to our joy was the absence of our friend, Sherri, who had to bow out at the last minute due to work. She was justifiably upset by this (as were we), as we had all planned on getting together for this event for so long, and were so looking forward to spending the day together....and she was sorely missed by us all.

We spent all day at the games, laughing, talking, shopping, and watching all the events. And at the end of the day, me, Tracy, Julia, Heidi, and Micki left to have dinner in old town Norcross, where we were joined by another of our group, Yvonne. After dinner, Yvonne, Micki, Tracy and I said goodnight to Heidi and Julia (who had to preach the next morning) and went next door to a neat little coffee shop for coffee. They had a house band playing, so we holed up in a back corner and chatted away for an hour or two before heading our separate ways.

It was a great time, and a memorable one. I am profoundly glad to have had the opportunity to meet each one of these lovely ladies who have added so much to my life, and I know that they will continue to be in my life for a long time to come. Quality never goes out of style...

I can't wait until next year!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This weekend....the drought is over! Yay!! With the gas prices finally getting respectable again, I finally get to go spend the weekend with my husband! It's been 7 weeks since we've been together...the longest time we've ever spent apart. And so help me, God...I will never go that long again. I can't stand it. And he's about to go up the wall. Never, ever again. Never.

In the future, should you ask me to go somewhere with you without my husband for an extended period of time, I give you fair warning now. The answer will probably be no, unless it's for no more than a day or so. I have lived far too long without him, and I don't intend to ever do it again once this trial is over in our lives. Simply put, I don't have to...and that's my perogative.

...But it doesn't mean that I will love any of you any less!

Day 497~~Oingo Boingo - It's a Dead Man's Party

Somebody sent me this today, and I thought it was perfect for Halloween. Enjoy!!! I did! ..

Day 504...

Ok, no positive talk today...unless you want to consider that I'm positively pissed. This is a rant session, plain and simple. I need to VENT.

So, I am responsible for Accounts Payable, right? That means that I cut all the checks for the company. Period. That's my territory. And that includes the petty cash checks for all four locations.

This past week, we had a crew go out to a gated community, and they took 20 bucks with them for the gate fee. Problem was, it wound up being 30 bucks, because they were met out there by another crew from our Athens location, and since we now had two trucks, the fees doubled.

Instead of the Athens crew going back to Athens for the 15 bucks, the guy took it out of his pocket and got reimbursed when he got back to Athens....from ATHENS' petty cash box. So now, there's 20 bucks out of Lithonia's box, and 10 out of Athens'. But it's for a Lithonia ticket.

The nazi that keeps the Lithonia box balanced kept trying to tell me that I needed to add that 10 bucks to Lithonia's box, because it was a Lithonia ticket. I kept telling her that it needed to be added to Athens' PC report to reimburse Athens, because the cash came out of their box. She went to my supervisor, who did not...repeat...did NOT come tell me I did it wrong. (I've been doing this for 6 years, now, btw...)

So this morning, I go give her the PC check for Lithonia, and she tells me I cut it wrong...it's 10 bucks short. I thought we were freaking done with this already! So I tell her no, it's not....and we start going round and round...again. I turn to walk out of her office, and she calls me dense. DENSE!

OK, sister...NOW who's being unprofessional, huh? WTF???!!!???

Holy cow. I told her that I may be dense, but at least I wasn't RUDE. I didn't come try to tell her how to do her billing....she doesn't need to tell me how to do my payables!

She actually followed me back across the hall into my office to try to convince me to recut this check. And when I said no, she took it to the BIG boss. Actually interrupted a meeting to take it to him...over ten freakin' bucks!!! Holy cow!!! She thinks she's entitled to call everybody's shots because she's been here since God was a child, so therefore she's the only one who has any sense.

My satisfaction came from the fact that she came out of that meeting, tail tucked between her legs, and went straight back to her office. I was NOT told to recut the check, thank you...

...Have I mentioned just how much I love my boss?

Day 505....

It's hard to believe we're about to go under the 500 day mark...whoo-hoo!

Ok...

I'm still on the wagon, folks...and we're hip-deep into week 4 already! That means I'm well past the mark where I usually bite the dust. The only other time I made it this far was back in '05 when I got so fit. This time, it FEELS different...and I know I'm going to succeed. To date, I've lost over 10 lbs.

Last night, we ran 3 1/4 miles. Both days this past weekend, we managed to put in 2 hours of track work, walking a total of 6 1/2 miles each day, 3 of those running. I feel great!! I have finally pushed past the initial soreness, and my muscles are finally responding as I knew they eventually would. They still get tired, mind you....but at least they don't give out on me.

Now...if I could just get my mind whipped into that good a shape, I'd be set!

Day 508...

Ok...I have to brag on my partner in crime, my future D-I-L, Krystal. She has matched me step for step on this journey I've been on for the past three weeks to get healthy, and I am so proud of her!

Two weeks ago, when she first started going out to the track with me, she couldn't even walk in pace with me for one lap without having to pull up, wheezing and gasping. I was continuously on her to speed up. She couldn't.

One week ago, she was keeping pace with me nicely on our walks, and asking me when I was going to let her start running with me. I assured her that I would let her start working on her running skills last Monday, which I did. I had to teach her how to pace herself, so that she could go the distance without burning out...a hard thing to learn if you've never done it. Along with her, I was trying to get back into the groove, myself. A year ago, I was running between 4 and 5 miles a day, but I hadn't run at all in the interim, so I was looking forward to retraining myself along with her...ya just can't jump back into it, ya know.

We started the week slowly...first, a lap. Then two. Then two, followed by four. Then a mile and a half. Last night, we did 26 laps on a quarter mile track. That's six and a half miles, folks. And three miles of it, we ran. Three miles. Three.

She's up to running three miles in less than a week!

I'm so freaking proud of her, I can't stand it. She's lost 21 lbs. so far, and last night, she pretty much finished her run ready to run more. I kept up with her, but I have to admit that I struggled the last three laps, and I'm feeling it today. I pushed too hard. Of course, the fact that I've got 24 years and 40 lbs. on her doesn't exactly help.

But you know what? I did it. And as bad as my body hurts right now, I will do it again today. Because I can. Because I need to. Because I must in order to survive and live the kind of life I choose to live. A healthy, active life, not a sedentary one. A long....VERY long life, in which to enjoy my children, and my grandchildren...and my husband. Always him.

The great thing about this is that he doesn't know about any of this. We're keeping it secret. And by the time I see him again, I will have lost twenty lbs.

Don't believe me? You better stay tuned....!

Day 509...

Day 509...
Current mood: grateful

Got a phone call of sorts last night from a very dear friend who I've been out of contact with lately. Not because I wanted to be, but because the circumstances of her life dictated that she put some distance between herself and everyone for a while. I didn't think it was good for her to do that, and I was right. Apparently, she's in the process of recovering from a suicide attempt. Thank God, she was unsuccessful!

I can't say that I didn't see this coming. I knew how depressed she was from the choices that she was forced...literally...to make. And I was powerless to help her. I know she was put into the situation that she's in by well-meaning people who love her dearly and feel that the choices they are forcing her to make are in her best interest, but they are not. They can't see all the pieces of the puzzle the way I can, and they will never be able to. But I do know that it was never their intention to push her so far, and even now, they have no idea that their actions were what drove her over the edge.

I will say, however, that I am glad that AT THE MOMENT, they are being as vigilant with her as they are, because she needs that stability in her life at the moment to be able to overcome the depression and get back on track, putting herself first for a change, which is something she has not been able to do for quite a long time. Thank God, she is now able to recognize that fact, and with help, is taking the steps she needs to in order to be able to get her life back together, and be healthy. Really healthy.

God is good. I can't imagine going forward in my life without her friendship. I've lost too many people in my life already who are near and dear to my heart. The loss of this dear friend would have crippled me horribly for a very, very long time.

Day 510...

Ok, so I feel like a real idiot right now, because I just deleted about seven or eight of my friends by accident....

Hopefully, they will forgive me and add me back, providing they are still willing to be associated with someone who would make such a stupid mistake!

I am now in the second half of week three, and still going strong, thank you. I passed a HUGE milestone last night...dinner with the family...and I am still here to tell the tale! So I am very proud of myself. I am also proud of Krystal, who is matching me step for step on this process. I am back up to running two miles, now, and she is already worked up to running a mile! We are determined to get healthy, and we are succeeding!

If you haven't seen my pics of Shanna's baby, check them out...I posted them last week.

Harmony is still doing well, she's decided that rolling across the floor to get a toy is her much preferred way to travel, so she is balking at the crawling thing, so far. No teeth yet, but we hold out great hope that it will happen eventually!

In other news, one of my coworkers suffered a house fire last week, so I've been very busy pulling double duty this past week. As a result, I have had little time for much else, but am happy that things are starting to get back to normal for her. Luckily, no one was hurt in the fire, and the damage was not a total loss. Please keep her and her family in your prayers as they try to rebuild what was destroyed, and rejoice over what was not.

Day 518...

I just heard from Shanna Malii, and she just had her ultrasound done. IT'S A BOY!!!

We're so excited to be able to add this precious new little one to our growing family next February. Soon, I will be getting pics, and I will post them either later today or tomorrow, so everyone can see what he 'looks' like! I'm betting he winds up looking like his Poppy!

Right now, the due date is February 20th, and his name will be....well...maybe I'll just wait on that for a while......

Day 524...

OMG....not even a full week on my program, and I've already hit my first goal! I've lost 5 lbs.!

Not much, I admit, but as Confucius' mother would say, "The journey of a gazillion pounds begins with getting your ass off the couch". Truer words were never spoken.

Day 526...

Well, here I am, behind in my posting...as usual. Holy cow... But I have an excuse this time, I swear! I've been sick. (hack, hack) Really.

Ok...lots to update on...

Saturday, Sept. 6th, I met with my Outlander buddies for dinner. We had a wonderful time, and not only did I get to drag Krystal with me this time, I met a new friend! *waves to Sherri* We had a great time gossiping and planning for the Stone Mountain games next month.

Found out that Tex is getting transferred to a new facility next month...about 20 miles north of where he works now...out in the middle of freaking nowhere, even MORE so than he already is....and it'll probably make the trip TWICE as long as it is now...(grumble, grumble) I keep hoping that they will forget this and just go ahead and transfer him up north...he's been approved for it, but they won't give it the green light....freakin' state.

Talked to Shanna....her due date is Feb. 20th....one day after Harmony's birthday...what are the odds?? She seems to be doing fine, and is due to have a 3-D ultrasound done on the 25th of this month. Stay tuned....

Just in case I didn't mention it already, Ian, Krystal, Harmony and I spent a GREAT Labor Day weekend with Poppy. All went well...Harmony is growing like a weed, and LOVES her Poppy! She sits in his lap and plays all day...or sleeps. He hates to let her go, and pretty much won't give her up unless he's eating.

And last, but certainly not least....I am back on my program again, thanks to this amazing nutritional drink I found, courtesy of my brother-in-law and his wife. It's so incredible, it defies description, but if you're reading this and you want to check it out, you can find out more about it at

www.exfuze.com/jillwalker

Among all the nutritional and health benefits it offers, which vary from person to person, and are MANY...it has completely suppressed my appetite, which is helping me tremendously with my ongoing battle to get healthy again. And I think it's also responsible for helping me get over what has been one of the nastiest colds I've ever had so quickly.

So far, so good...more to come on the progress of my health journey, so stay tuned!

Day 552...

I really miss my hubby today. I have all week. This separation is like the ocean...it ebbs and flows like the tide. Right now, I'm not sure if I should consider myself at high tide...or low.

I have felt extremely close to him all week, most likely spurred on by our anniversary, and all that that entails...but at the same time, the wait is making me weary. I'm so tired of being apart! But it's not constructive to feel that way. Not like I can do anything about it, after all...except to stand. So...I'm standing.

But I don't have to like it! And I don't.

*sigh*

In other news...I just received some very sad news from someone who is fast becoming a good friend, and my heart is aching for her and her family. I don't know which is harder in the long run...to watch someone slowly slip away from this life, but have the ability to give their loved ones closure at the end, or to lose someone so quickly that you never have the chance to say goodbye, and tell them how much they mean to you.

If there is one lesson I have learned in this life, it's this: Cherish your loved ones while you can. Hold them close, speak kind words to them...share your heart. Because we can never know until it's too late whether or not we will get that special blessing of closure in the end.

To my friend: May God bless you and your family, and may His Mercy and Grace follow you all the days of your lives. Be sure that I will hold you all in my heart and my prayers as you go through this next few weeks.

Day 555...

Thought I'd just say that I spent the most wonderful weekend with my hubby. He's soooo romantical-like! I just luuuuv him!

Tomorrow is our second anniversary. I just wish we could be together for the day, but I guess I should be thankful we had the whole weekend, huh?

Oh, well...more tomorrow.

Day 559...

Can I just tell you how grateful I am right now?? There are no words. I have been through one helluva week, I can tell you that much, at least!

Ok...so it started out because I was an idiot, right? Turns out it would have been stressful regardless, so I'm not stressing over the idiot part any more. I got better things to do...

So, two weeks ago was Bill's birthday....July 30th. Other than sentimental reasons, you would think that wouldn't really be important. But in my world, it still is, even though he's been gone almost 5 years. Why? Cuz my truck's still in his name, and that means in the Great State of Georgia, the tag is due to be paid by then.

So...I forgot to pay it. That was the idiot part. What can I say? Life is nuts right now.

Anyway...on my way home on Monday, a nice young officer with the Conyers PD was nice enough to point it out to me. He was even helpful enough to give me a big yellow reminder...wasn't that sweet of him?

So....after sweating my way to work in fear of being stopped, hat in hand, I called the tag office on Tuesday morning to find out what the damage was going to be...even as I cringed. But monetarily, at least, it was not nearly as bad as I had feared...only monstrous instead of astronomical. Whew! Problem was, when I came in to renew, I had to bring Bill's driver's license. Now, that presented a problem, seeing as he's been gone almost 5 years. I don't actually have his driver's license any more. I've never needed it before...as I pointed out to the nice lady on the phone. Apparently, the laws in the Great State of Georgia changed this year...imagine that...so that you can't renew unless they see the driver's license of the owner...and as I mentioned earlier...the truck is still in Bill's name.

So...I explain the situation, and she tells me that you can't renew a tag for a deceased person any more...the state won't recognize it. And she tells me when I come in, NOT to tell them he's dead. And to bring in a bunch of other documents that will hopefully throw up a big enough smoke screen that they won't ask for his ID.

That afternoon, I sweat my way home, and gather all the documents I need to sweat my way over and assault the tag office on Wednesday, after I sweated my way back to work. At the tag office, they won't let me renew...because I don't have his ID....plain and simple. They didn't even LOOK at all the other documents I had brought, insisting on his ID. Can he not bring it in himself? noooo....he can't. Can he give it to me so I can bring it in for him? nope. Can he mail it in? not possible. What about fax? not. gonna. happen! It is not possible.

Finally, I gave up, and showed her the death certificate. oh, she says. Then she disappears, and comes back later to inform me that I have to get Chrysler to put my name on the loan. hyeah. right.

So, in complete and utter dejection, I sweat my way back to the office, trying not to panic, and call Chrysler. I get some chick with a heavy accent, probably overseas somewhere, who doesn't seem to understand the words that are coming out of my mouth. She wants to send me a form so I can qualify for a loan to assume the loan I've been paying for the past 5 years, so they can make damn sure they're gonna get the last 11 payments. I told her I wouldn't qualify for a loan, and she says that's the only way my name can go on the title. How stupid is that??? The truck is in the name of 'the estate of William Hoffman'. There is no estate, and there is no go-to guy for them. The loan is being held by a dead man. If I tell 'em to come get the truck, they're up the proverbial creek, sans paddle! Would it not be to their ADVANTAGE to put someone's name on the title, for SECURITY's sake?? I explain this to the accent girl, and she puts me on eternal hold, at the end of which she says she's gonna fax over the paperwork to assign me the loan, but it will be at least an hour before I get it. I ask again...will I have to qualify for this? Nope, she says...it will be automatic.

FINALLY...I'm getting somewhere!

I still had to sweat my way home on Wednesday, because of course, it was the end of the day. But Thursday morning, after I had sweated my way back to work, the fax was there, waiting on me. A standard retail contract loan application form. No freakin' way!

So, I had to wait until that afternoon, after the office cleared out, and while they were buffing the floor outside my office door, to call them back...so my coworkers wouldn't hear all the screaming and crying. This time, after MUCH hassle, I managed to get hold of a superviser that spoke much clearer English, thank God...but who was no more helpful than the other girl had been. Nope...they couldn't do ANYTHING to help me. AND he got snotty with me, accusing me of trying to pull something over on them, because obviously I hadn't had any problems renewing the car for the past 5 years, but now all of a sudden...

I think that's when I finally broke down and completely lost it. I was losing my truck...Bill's truck. The last thing he bought, even though he never made a payment on it, not one. The only thing I have left of his.

In desperation and tears, I finally called back my contact at the tag office, and told her what I'd been through, asking her if there was a way the tag office could fax Chrysler a form explaining what they needed, and why, even knowing it was a long shot. And after quite a few hold sessions, during which time she'd come back and ask me a zillion questions, she finally came back and told me to go online and pay it...but that I didn't hear it from them. She gave me the website.

I went online and paid the bill. Just like that.

How freaking rediculous that I just spent a week of sheer hell, pushing me to the brink of madness...literally...for no reason? Is there any sanity in this state? Is there any doubt why we want OUT of it???

OMG! At least I'm legal again. And I'll have to do the same thing next year, even though by then, I will have paid the last payment. But I have no idea how in the hell I'm going to get them to issue the title in my name. That will be a whole new can of worms for me to deal with. But at least, it's a year away, and I have time to work on it. Thank God.

And thank God for Angels in the tag office of this otherwise God-forsaken state!

OA Update a/k/a Day 575...

No, O A does NOT stand for Overeater's Anonymous (although maybe it should), it stands for Outlanders Anonymous! And if you are a 'member', no explanation is necessary.

I met with my friend Julia and two new members, Michelle and Micki on Saturday the 19th for dinner at Houston's in Marietta. We had a ball, as usual, talking about the GM games, and Jamie and Claire (of course), and making plans for future get-togethers. The two M's were very excited, and I think it has spurred them to post more on the online board, which made ME excited. Anything to get lurkers to come out of hiding...

Our next big adventure will be on September 6th, in Cartersville. We're meeting up there this time, so more people can come...we have 3 members who live in or near Rome, and have a hard time getting so far south. So those of us who live farther south are going to carpool...which will be fun for us, too!

This is shaping up to be a pretty big event...the biggest to date, as we will have 7 people attending, maybe more. I can't wait...I know we will have a ball, and probably get kicked out of the restaurant because they are trying to close for the night. That's ok, though...I've been informed that there's a Waffle House just down the street, where we can move the party after closing, if need be!

Plans are also in the works for a bigger event that we're working on putting together for later in the fall, which will involve both Atlanta and Birmingham, and possibly our girls over in SC, too! That would be AWESOME, as I'm very anxious to meet them. More on that later...

IN OTHER NEWS...

Alan and I just found out last week that we're going to be grandparents again. Shanna and Kyle are once again expecting, and we're excited for them. We'll know more about that soon, and I will post the details then.

Speaking of grandchildren, our beautiful granddaughter, Harmony finally learned how to coordinate her movements to roll over yesterday. Yay, Harmony! She's been working on trying to figure it out for a while now, but couldn't get it down. Yesterday, it all came together for her, and she spent the day practicing her new skill in earnest. Mom Krystal spent the day trying to capture it all on video for posterity's sake, but unfortunately, Harmony IS a Kid, and Kids rarely perform on cue...something in the fine print of their contracts, no doubt. If we do manage to get it on film, be sure I will post it on my page so you all can view it and be properly awed and overcome with the emotion of it all...

And speaking of my gorgeous hubby, we spent a fabulous day together this past Sunday, which was entirely too short, as always, but after 3 weeks, beggars can't be choosers. The important thing is...we're down to a little over 18 months now, and counting. I actually picked up a little freebie keyring at the Grandfather Mountain games a couple of weeks ago when I was up there, and I reset it to count down to the day Alan's contract expires with the Not-So-Great State of Georgia. To date, we have 575 days left, which in one way sounds like so much worse than 18 months, but in another way sounds far less. So I think from now on, I will do the same thing as I did last year when I was counting down Shanna Malii's birthday, and use the subject line in my posts as a counter. Maybe it will make the time go by faster, eh?

Anything to make the time go by faster...

Wow, I'm really behind...

So much has happened in the past six weeks, I hardly know where to begin! On the weekend of July 4th, Krystal, Ian and I took Harmony down to spend the weekend with her Poppy in S. GA. We all had a great time, and Harmony got to see fireworks for the first time. She loved them, big booms and all! There's a pic posted under my photos of her, taken in the glow of the fireworks overhead, if you're interested.

Then...

Ever since last fall, when my friend Tracy and I went to the Stone Mountain Highland Games, we've been planning a trip to go to Grandfather Mountain in NC for their games, widely touted as being one of the best games in the country. As we were packing for the trip to TN to stay with my in-laws, we got word that our favorite author, Diana Gabaldon was going to be there. That put our whole weblist into a frenzy, and brought down one of our fellow members from Ohio with her daughter, to spend the weekend with us.

We had the best weekend, ever! Leaving on Thursday morning, we traveled to Elizabethton, TN, met with April and her daughter, Sarah, who were staying there, and drove to Grandfather Mtn, just across the state line. Although it was a rainy night, we were able to be there for the opening ceremonies, and the calling of the clans.

Friday morning dawned bright and clear, and we were back early to enjoy the day, watching the festivities, browsing the vendor tents, researching at the clan tents, and trying Scottish food...including haggis. (Not bad...a little heavy on the cloves, though) Friday evening, Diana would be at a book signing in Boone, about an hour away, so we left the games about 3pm, intending to find the bookstore, and then go explore the town. Once we got to the store, though, we found that there would be no entry to the book signing unless we bought a book at the store for her to sign, and it was first come, first serve. It being 4 pm at that time, and noone waiting ahead of us, we bought coffee, and parked in their cafe for the duration.

3 hours later, precisely on time, Diana showed up, looking like the goddess whose name she bears. She spoke for about 30 minutes and answered questions, then signed our books. What a gracious and delightful lady! Everything we had heard was true, and then some. She rushed no one, taking her time with each of us, and posing for as many pics as she was asked to, even though the store was like an oven from all the people who attended. We got lots of pics, and even managed to get a few autographs for others. Then we left the store, and enjoyed a final dinner with April and Sarah in Boone, knowing that it might be the last time we would see each other for a while.

It's a wonderful feeling, knowing you have friends all over the world. And totally exhilarating to meet them...but it comes with a price. The parting is so hard.

Saturday, as April and Sarah made their way back to Ohio, Tracy and I spent the day with my in-laws, and my brother-in-law Andy, and his wife, Sherry, who had driven up the previous night from Atlanta for the weekend. After a lazy morning of visiting and catching up, we all drove over to Lake Watauga for a seafood lunch overlooking the lake. Later that evening, we drove into the town of Elizabethton for an old car show held on the main street of the town, and then headed to Ft. Watauga for a historical reenactment.

Tracy and I took our time heading back to Atlanta on Sunday, enjoying each others' company and reliving our wonderful weekend. Of course, I've posted pics if you're interested, and I can't wait to tell Alan all about it when I see him this weekend! (All the old car pics were taken for him, incedentally. No, I'm not obsessed...it's research.)

Anyway, that's all the news in a nutshell. That, and my baby is growing like a weed! She'll be 6 months old before we know it!

For My Father ~ Birl Randolph Brown, Sr.

I wrote this last year at the request of my pastor, who wanted a little background info on my dad in preparation for the funeral, and just came across it today. So, since in June, we mark the anniversary of my father's death, and his birth, celebrate Father's Day, and also remember his wedding anniversary to my mom, I thought it might be appropriate to reprint it here...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't know how to begin to put down in words….especially short words…all that my father was. A brief history would take days to speak, much less to read, but I will do my best.

Daddy was born on June 14, 1920 in rural South Georgia, the oldest of 6 children. He finished the 8^th grade before being forced to leave school to help support the growing family. He enlisted in the Army in 1942 at the beginning of World War II, and was in the 2^nd armored division, serving as General Patton's personal radio operator. Before the war was over, he had served in 7 major theatres of operation across North Africa and Europe, including the invasion at Normandy, met the Russians at the Elba River at the end of the war, and had earned a Bronze Star for his excellence in keeping 2 crews of electricians leap-frogging in front of the advancing army, setting up communications tents for the commanding officers, sometimes twice a day .

Upon returning from the war, he worked for GA Power for ten years, during which time he met my mother, Maudie. They had a wonderful marriage, which gave them 3 children over the course of 27 years…their oldest daughter, Ann, an only son, Randy (who later died in 1987), and me. Right after I was born in 1963, my mother was diagnosed with M.S., and daddy took care of her for 10 years, often working 2 or 3 jobs to support the family, while also putting himself through law school. By the time of my mother's death in 1972, I was the only one living at home, and daddy went to work for Southern Bell, accepting a job in the central office in Forest Park, where he met my mom.

Kitty, who had one daughter, Sheryl, from a previous marriage, was in the middle of going through a very painful divorce, and that pain of separation was no stranger to my recently widowed dad. They bonded immediately, marrying on June 21, 1974. During their 33 year marriage, they were soul mates like no others have ever been. Where one ended, the other began. One's weaknesses were the other's strengths. They fought…and loved… fiercely, for they were nothing if not passionate. And that passion encompassed their entire lives, spreading out into everything they touched, and into everyone they loved.

As their children grew, and married, and had grandchildren, and then great-grandchildren, my father's legacy continued to grow. He valued knowledge above all things, and reveled in sharing that knowledge with his grandchildren. Everything in his life was used as an instrument to teach lessons, using his personal history, as well as his knowledge of the world at large. This is the main reason his granddaughter, Alaina, became a school teacher. He was a 32^nd degree Freemason, having received that legacy from his maternal grandfather, which ultimately inspired his grandson, Brandon, to also join the Fraternal Order. And his love of poetry and use of words inspired his granddaughter, Jessica, to also become a poet.

The older he got, the more his world narrowed down to a single window…his computer, and the internet…in which he never tired. His love of reading and writing prose and poetry grew and expanded into a world of geneology, which he shared by email with distant and not-so-distant relatives all across the country, becoming active in the geneological web community, helping others to find links to their past, and sharing the masses of information he had accumulated to anyone who might be interested , as well as many who were not.

My daddy loved to talk and communicate above all things, and no one was immune to being "captured" by him. If he had a story to tell, a bit of information to share, or an opinion about something, anyone in the immediate vicinity was going to hear it…whether it was invited, relevant or appropriate at the time may have been up to anyone's guess, but no matter, it was always, without fail, interesting!

Throughout his life, my dad had always been of a spiritual bent, although not in the traditional sense, but in his last year, he found himself turning more toward the inward parts, and considered his pastor a spiritual soul-mate.

My father was truly a unique individual. There will never, ever be another one like him, and the legacy that he has left to his 10 grandchildren, and 5 (soon to be 7) great-grandchildren, will not only be never forgotten, but continue to be passed on for generations to come.

In summary, my daddy was a WWII veteran, poet, scholar, theologian, Freemason, amateur radio operator, pilot, historian, tri-lingual world-traveller (he was fluent in both French and German), storyteller par excellence, avid reader and web surfer, electrician, scientist, patriarch, and most importantly, he was a most humble servant of the Lord.

In Memoriam...

Today marks the first anniversary of the death of my father. He was a great man, one of a dwindling breed of great men who grew up near the turn of the 20th century. During his lifetime, he went from living on a farm in rural south GA when few had cars and none had paved roads to being on the forefront of the computer age. Few men I know had more hardware savvy than my Dad, and the know-how to use it. His computer was the window to his world, and he relished it.

A brilliant man, he embraced life whole-heartedly, even as he aged and battled the weaknesses in his body, his mind always reached for more. His one great fear was losing the ability to think and reason...and expand his knowledge of the universe around him. A forward thinker like no other, he constantly urged those around him to uncork genii and think outside the box. And he would not rest until we did.

So much of who I have evolved into as I have grown and aged has been a direct result of his teaching...my love of the arts...great composers, opera, art, and literature...always literature. For my Dad was a writer...and had the soul of a poet...above all else. And I will miss him terribly...always.

I love you, Daddy. Thank you.

Check-in Time!

Well, I guess every two weeks ain't too bad, huh? Things have slowed down a lot lately, so there's not as much to report right now. All the kids are stable and maintaining, so that's good. And my grandbabies are growing like weeds...which I absolutely hate, and can do nothing about!

Yes, I want them to grow big and strong...but do they have to do it so FAST?? That's my gripe...I just want them to stay little for a while longer. This time in their lives goes by so quickly, and it never comes again.

*sigh*

Anyway, I'm getting ready to have another GNO with my sisters-in law this week, which I can't wait for...it's been far too long as it is. And I'm finalizing plans for the next Outlanders Anonymous Atlanta Meeting on Saturday. Don't know how big a turnout it's going to be, but I'm hoping there will be some new faces, at least! Unfortunately, I don't think Tracy will be able to come this time, because she was just over here twice in May. Guess she's due for a break...but just for a month or two!

The one new face I'd give anything to see at our meeting would be Grace's..my friend in San Jose, who I can't wait to meet...even though I know I've known her for ages past. But that day is coming....

In the meantime, thank God for cell phones and emails!

Update Time...

OK, so who here DOESN'T know that I have serious geek potential? I mean, come on...it's written all over me...sometimes literally.

Anyway...for some time now I've been involved with this Yahoo! online discussion group for my alltime favorite author, Diana Gabaldon, and I finally got my friend Tracy in AL to read the books...after years of begging, literally...and she got hooked enough to want to join this group too. Now, this group is made up of people all over the world, which makes it kinda neat...and I've made a couple of really awesome buddies on this list, a couple of whom are in my friends list here. *waves*

I finally started talking to one girl who lives fairly close, and we decided to try to get together a couple of weeks ago, for coffee, and so we could actually meet in person. One thing led to another, and we wound up putting out an all-points bulletin on the board for anyone who lived in Atlanta and wanted to join us. We wound up, even on short notice, with 5 people coming (one being Tracy) and more who said they would have if they could have planned ahead of time.

We met at a restaurant in Snellville, and had a BLAST...a real girl's night. Wound up closing down the joint and still weren't through, so we said good night to a couple of the girls, and three of us took the party to the Waffle House to continue our conversation over coffee. I can't remember when I've had such a great time just gabbing! It was a much enjoyed...and much needed...diversion. We hope to do it again, soon.

In the meantime, I've managed to get Tex semi-hooked on the books, too, and I've been posting his comments on the board, too, as A Man's Opinion. The ladies are eating it up!

So, he's a verra popular lad right about now, and I've got a major feather in my cap for landing such a 'caring and sensitive' guy...

Who'da thunk it?

I guess it's about time, again...

Time for another update, I guess, since it's been about two weeks. All is going pretty smoothly, really. Nothing much to update on, and that's why I really haven't gone out of my way...

Haven't heard much from Shanna and Kyle, other than that Kyle is working long hours, and Shanna is looking for work. Apparently everything's good with them.

Jessica is in NC, visiting. Don't know when she'll be back. Didn't know she'd left until she'd been gone a couple of days. Guess it was on a 'need to know' basis, and I didn't need to know.

Ian and Krystal are doing pretty good for the most part. Harmony went to AL last week to spend some time with her other Granny, and it gave them a much-needed break, but Krystal overdid it and pulled some internal stitching, so she's under Dr.'s care for that right now. It will probably take her a week or more to heal, and in the meantime, we're all trying to pinch-hit with Harmony. I think Krystal's mom might be coming to spend a few days and help her with the baby. I hope.

Harmony had a check-up yesterday. She's healthy as a horse, and now weighs just shy of 14 pounds! We've got to start putting a brick on that child's head, I swear... She's also starting to smile, laugh, and coo. I love it!

And that just leaves me and Tex. Sunday was his birthday, so I went down and spent the weekend with him. We had a lovely time, and laughed and joked the whole time. A much needed release after the past few months. Nothing like the medicine of laughter to cure what ails ya.

I have started back on my diet and exercise program, so if you see me and I'm not heading for the track....kick my butt, will ya? I'm back up to two miles, and counting! My goal is to hit 6 miles by the end of summer, and then I can work on increasing my speed. I have to be able to run it in under an hour if I wanna get the t-shirt at the Peachtree Road Race next year (my ultimate goal).

Wish me luck!

So Sweet...

It's been a real pleasure to be able to babysit my granddaughter, Harmony, the past two weekends. I've had such a good time getting to know her for the little person she is. There's nothing more inspiring to watch a baby develop and grow into their own little individual personality. They're just such little blank slates, full of potential and possibilities...and it's so sweet and touching to be able to view and experience that innocence first-hand before the world starts corrupting it. Such a blessing from God...

Yesterday was the first time I was able to take her to church with me. I am not often able to go myself, because I'm usually out of town with Tex, but she was such a little angel all day, even with everything that was going on around her, and all the unfamiliar people (even if it was family) wanting to hold her and cuddle her. But she was awake and alert through most of it, and never even fussed. I didn't take her to the nursery, preferring to sit on the back row with the family instead, and had lots of help with her during the service. It was a really great time, and I felt good knowing that Ian and Krystal were getting a much needed break.

Our little girl is growing up so fast...she's almost 12 pounds already, and is getting too big to wear her clothes, so we're moving her into the next size. She's already 8 weeks old...I can't believe time has flown by so fast! There's a part of me that wishes that I could slow it down...at least for this part. Let her be small and trusting and innocent for just a while longer before she has to grow up and face reality. It will be here all too soon as it is...

Who sez you can't go home again...??

Ok, so here’s part two...

A couple of weeks ago, when everything got crazy, I started having a "Calgon, take me away!" crisis moment. I mean, I really, really needed a break. But...alas...no moolah. So I’m in the middle of this discussion with my sister, and I tell her, what I really, really need is to go to NC to visit my friends Bonnie and Scott for a few days. She agrees. Problem is...no moolah. Oh, well, right? I can dream...

...except...God has a funny way of hearing the prayers you think you’ve kept to yourself.

The day after this conversation, I get this text message from my NC friend, Bonnie, which says..."If I give you gas money, will you come see me?"

Say what...?

Yep. I read it right. Uh...yeah, I think I can manage that.

So I made arrangements to go up this past weekend. I left on Thursday night, just after work, and got up there about midnight. Great trip up, made good time. I was so happy to be there again! It’s just like going home for me. The place where everything just feels...right. Everybody’s got one, that’s mine, I guess.

Anyway, we got up Friday morning, and headed down to Atlantic Beach, which is about an hour away. The weather was beautiful, temp perfect for a stroll on the beach, enjoying the scenery, snapping pics, collecting shells, and sharing great company. We also toured the fort that’s there...again. Fort Macon is a Civil War fort that was built right on the beach, and was used all the way through WWII. It’s still incredibly preserved, and if you ever get the chance to go, I highly recommend it!

After that, we had cocktails and dinner at my favorite restaurant, the Channel Marker, which sits right on the water. Awesome!

Saturday was spent being really, really lazy. A couple of errands, and a trip to the cemetery to put out some flowers on my late hubby’s grave, and we spent the rest of the day catching up and reminiscing. Kinston is one of the most peaceful places on the planet, I think. Flat coastal land stretching out so far in places you can see the curvature of the earth, with freshly-turned fields of the blackest, richest dirt you can imagine. Mostly cropland, in the summer you can go by miles upon miles of fields full of tobacco, cotton, corn and soybeans, robust, and ready for harvest. The people are so friendly, they’ve never met a stranger...and no matter how long you’ve been gone, they never, ever forget you.

Sunday morning came all too soon. Before I knew it, we were having to say goodbye so I could get on the road to come home...which I did, right after they loaded me up with baby stuff for Harmony. We laughed and cried all weekend long, and I cannot tell you how much I missed them the second they were out of sight.

Few people are blessed with people in their lives they can call true...really true...friends. I have been very blessed, and with more than just these two. But these two are very, very special, indeed. They are the oldest, and will always have a special place in my heart. Together, we have been through the best...and the worst...of times. And yet, in spite of it all, we’re still here for each other. And I know that we always will be.

Tomorrow, they will celebrate their 20th anniversary. I will not be there to share it with them in person, but they know I will be there in spirit, to wish them many, many more.

I love you guys so much. And from the bottom of my heart, thank you for always being there. Happy, happy anniversary!!!

Lots to update!!!

Wow, I’ve really got to do this more often! In my own defense, though, it’s a little hard when stuff is happening so fast you don’t have time before it’s old news and something else has happened already...

Well, first off...

My youngest and her hubby have decided to move back to Florida for a while to get themselves together before they try again. They’ve been struggling to make things work, and it just wasn’t happening for them, so they’ve decided to make a tactical retreat so they could come back stronger later. He got a great job offer in Sarasota, and they felt like they just couldn’t turn it down, so they moved back down weekend before last, with help from his father. Appears as though all is well so far, although I haven’t heard anything from them this past week, so I can only assume...(ahem).

On the same weekend they left, I took Ian, Krystal, Jes and Harmony down to see Alan for the weekend. It was the first time for Krystal and Harmony, and nothing could be sweeter looking than seeing Poppy holding that baby all day. Hopefully the first of many to come! A good time was had by all...

BUT...two days later, Ian had a wreck, and totalled his Jeep. So transportation wise, they’re all but back to square one. Fortunately, Krystal has a car, it’s just in the shop being repaired, so they’re not completely without resources. I can pinch-hit until it’s on the road. And the biggest blessing of all was that Ian walked away virtually without a scratch. If you saw the Jeep, you’d be amazed. By all rights, he should be either paralyzed or dead. It was a true miracle and a blessing from God. We are very, very thankful.

And last, but not least, I just got back from an incredible weekend of fun, friendship, and relaxation. But since there’s a lot to tell, I think I’ll tell it in a separate post tomorrow!

Don't know what to say...

Somebody broke my heart today. Somebody very special to me. There’s been a lot of that going on this week. I broke someone else’s too. Someone who most definately didn’t deserve it. And I don’t know how to fix any of it. I don’t want to talk about it, really. I just needed to vent for a sec. So if you read this, and wonder what’s going on...please. Don’t ask me, because I won’t tell you.

I’ve never felt so helpless in my life...

The Passing of Time....

One day a child is born, the next, she's almost 3 weeks old! Where does the time go?

Well, it has just come to my attention...yet again...that I'm way past due with my blogging, so I thought I would try to play catch-up before too much more time slipped by me, and my granddaughter is ready to graduate.

The house erupted in chaos the week after the baby was born, so we had to call a family meeting to get things ironed out, and to keep things from getting out of hand again, we've decided to hold weekly meetings for a while.

Then, last weekend, I threw my back out, which hasn't happened in about a year and a half....fun, fun! So here I am with a new grandbaby that I can't even enjoy cause I can't get out of bed!

Last weekend was also the first weekend in all these years that I've been going to see Tex that I told him I was going and didn't go. I cried all day Sunday, more from that than the pain.

I also found out today that my grandson, Dakota, fell down a set of stairs and sustained a minor concussion, so I'm a little worried about that. We're watching him.

On the flip side, I've gained an incredible new friend this week that I'm terribly excited about. And I get to babysit tonight...overnight, no less...for the first time! I'm more excited than anything about that! So I'm looking forward to an incredible weekend, and I hope you all have one, too!

More later...

Passages...

I can not begin to describe the mixture of emotions that I have experienced in the last 24 hours as I have seen the circle of life complete itself in the birth of my beautiful new granddaughter, Harmony Grace Higginbotham. She tried to jump into the world feet-first...literally. So mom underwent a C-section to help her get here just a bit faster. She arrived at 12:37pm yesterday afternoon, weighing 8lbs., 2.3oz and measuring 19 1/2 inches long...just a few tenths of an oz. off her daddy's stats. She has so many features of both her parents, but is unmistakeably her own little person, and I can't wait to watch the changes she will undergo as the little girl in her unfolds into the woman she will become one day.

This Grandparent thing is going to take a lot of getting used to, I can see right off. It makes me wonder how our parents managed to bite their tongues without doing major damage when I had mine. Already I have had to resist the urge to charge in and take over, because I've "been there and done that" and have the experience now that mine are grown to do so much better than I did with them, knowing absolutely nothing! Such a shame that we have to go into the parent thing without that experience, and, well....

I guess Harmony is not the only one who has gone through a passage.

Welcome to the world, my beautiful little princess. I'll try not to spoil you too much, or get in the way of your parents earning their own stripes like I did. But I sure do have a greater appreciation of my parents today than I did yesterday.

Aak! I've got an arrow in my butt...

...and I've had one for quite some time!

I guess I should be really bummed that I have to spend Valentine's Day away from my hubby. Strangely, though, I'm not. I guess it's because I feel like we've been together all day, regardless of the miles. I know we've been thinking about each other like crazy, but I look at the bright side...This is the last holiday that we only have 3 more of...from this day forward, we will only have to spend two more apart from each other...2 more Memorial days, 2 more 4th of Julys, 2 more Labor days, 2 more Thanksgivings, Christmasses, and New Years. Only two more birthdays to spend apart, and two more anniversaries. That's something to celebrate! Valentine's Day is a milestone for us, and an important one...for that reason.

I don't need a special day to know that man loves me more than life. He lets me know every single chance he gets. I don't need a special day to tell him that he's my world. He knows it already, because I let him know every single day. The days that we're not together in person, we're together in spirit. We live that way, and in that respect, we are never, ever separated. Regardless of what happens in the future, we rest assured that we will never, ever, EVER spend another day apart...ever.

I am in love with the most wonderful man in the world, and I know that I am well and truly cherished.

Happy Valentine's Day, my beloved husband...today, and every day!

A Quiet Night at Home...For a Change...

Sitting at home, surfing the web, it just occurred to me that I haven't blogged in a while, so I guess now's as good a time as any to update.

Last Saturday, we held a family baby shower for Krystal, and it went very well. Jes and Malii were in charge of the games...need I say more? Didn't think so...

The new job is also still...going. Not sure what else to say about that. It's a strange little job in a strange little store working for a very strange little Dr. Perfect for me.

I am gearing up to spend another Valentine's Day alone, since it falls in the middle of the week. That sucks, but since I've already received my card, I guess I can't complain too much. After all, he is thinking about me, Valentine's Day or not. I know it, just like I know I'm sitting in this chair. I don't need a card to prove I am not just loved, but cherished.

And I'm finally, officially, really getting excited about the baby, which is due in less than 3 weeks now. I can't wait to finally be able to hold that precious little bundle!

Things seem to be going a bit better at the house. After a bit of a rocky start, it all seems to be stabilizing out, everyone getting into their respective routines. Malii and Kyle are back in school, and holding court there. Seems that being a married student is a bit of a novelty, especially when your spouse is in most of your classes with you! They seem to be doing very well, despite it all, and are on track to graduate at the end of the summer, believe it or not.

Jes seems to be holding her own at the moment, still staying with Keeli. Fortunately, they get along really well. She's thinking of going back to school...finally. I hope she goes through with it.

And I am incredibly, madly, and deeply in love with the most incredible man in the world! Happy Valentine's Day, sweetheart!

Turning Point...

Last week, an angel named J.J. walked into my life and handed me the part-time job I've been looking for to fill the exact time slots I needed to fill to be effective. I have to confess, I'm still in shock over this, but that doesn't mean I'm not profoundly thankful at the same time. And if that wasn't enough, my sister Sheryl got a job with the same woman...a full-time job (not part time like mine) that will get her out of the hell-hole more formally known as Hobby Lobby, and also out of the retail industry, period. That, my friends, has been a long time coming, and also a true answer to prayer, even though initially it seems as though she will be taking a pay cut to take this job. In the long run, though, I truly believe that she will actually wind up making more. I know the quality of life she will experience will more than make up for the difference!

We are both extremely excited about this new venture, which we will both start tomorrow. For me, it means that the financial noose that's been chafing my neck for so long will finally be loosened a bit, and I'll have more ability to help my kids and to help with the little one when she finally does get here. That will be such a blessing, just to know that I can, if I need to, whether I ever actually have to, or not!

Speaking of which...

We now only have 5 more weeks to wait until little Harmony (we think) makes her appearance! We are all so excited, we just can't wait. Personally, with Krystal's blond hair and Ian's dark hair, I'm rooting that she'll be a blazing red-head like her great-granddaddy Birl, and of course, her Nana (cough).

Wouldn't that be something???

Heartbreak...

Often as we grow older, and watch our children grow into adulthood and start families of their own, and assume adult responsibilities, it's all too easy to assume along with it that as long as they act fine, they can totally handle whatever life throws at them. But sometimes they just can't...nobody could...and it's so hard to know what to do to help, when there is nothing...absolutely nothing...that can be done TO help, except to feel...helpless.

That is where I am right now. My youngest daughter has suffered a miscarriage. A loss so devastating it defies description. I cannot imagine the depth of their pain, and I feel totally helpless against it, knowing there is nothing I can do to ease their loss. But I do know that it is during the darkest times in our lives that God's love shines the brightest, and I know that there is a reason why this happened, even though we don't understand it. The pain will dull in time, leaving a lingering sadness for what might have been. And we just have to trust in God's wisdom, that it was for the best. But the love we still feel for that precious little being will live on, and not be forgotten. That much I do know.

...And....we're OFF!

For all intents and purposes, today is the beginning of a brand new year. A year full of hope and promise. And it marks the end of a year full of accomplishments, of milestones reached and passed, as time rolls ever onward.

The year ahead holds much to look forward to, as I anticipate the birth of my son's daughter (we think) and my daughter's son (we think). There could not be much that could happen that would be sweeter than that. Matter of fact, I can only think of one thing, and that, too is a possibility this year. So who knows? The sky is the limit this year! And like one of my best friends keeps telling me, no matter what I am faced with, the answer is...I CAN!

I CAN forge stronger bonds with my family. I CAN get out of debt. I CAN watch healthy grandchildren come into this world. I CAN get healthy, really healthy, and I CAN stay that way. I CAN save enough money to go on the trip of a lifetime. I CAN keep 4 households afloat. I CAN find a second job that meets my needs. I CAN go forward with planning our move to TN. I CAN find a job when I get there.

I CAN be ready for good news in June. I CAN keep on keeping on, even when I am faced with bitter disappointment, because I CAN keep my eye on the finish line, no matter what. And the finish line is getting closer all the time.

I CAN balance all my eggs on one platter. I CAN multi-task. I CAN take time out for ME without the world coming to an end. I CAN say no!

And always, always, I CAN show my family, especially my husband, my children, and my grandchildren, how very, very much I love them, because I CAN do all things through Christ, who strengthens me!

Here's to a wonderful, awsome adventure called 2008! Bring it ON!